I Got Something To Say !

I am having a very hard time this month as I do every year at this time dealing with anniversaries of peoples deaths that are in my family like my mom and my papaw. My mom was born Oct 20th of 1919, she died Nov 1 1999. My papaw died Oct 24 th about 5 years before she did. It's all very hard you see. I know there in heaven in a much better place, but it doesn't stop me from missing them. I don't like to think about it. I try not to be sad. I try not to think about them so that I want be sad. Sometimes that just doesn't work. God can heal our broken heart. The Bible says blessed are those that mourn for they shall be comforted so I try to hang on to that.

Forgive Me

Forgive Me

Words said in anger

All in efforts trying to heal

With a sorrowful heart I bend and kneel

Lord, forgive me.

Enemies, Frienemies

Fake and real

Sorry for the damage

Caused by loss, suffering, and medicine I used to heal.

Sorry for the words ill-spoken

and the way it made you feel.

Forgive me

Let this peace be a seal

By: Bernice Bowling

Forgiveness, It Is A Choice

Unforgiveness  of past hurts and betrails, lies and abuse can take such a hold on you that it will produce a monster in you just like the ones who did you wrong only worse.  It will take your life and eat away at ever fiber of your being every part of you until their is nothing left. It starts out as a small seed , then before you know it . It's taken root and has grown into a large tree.

You have to forgive not only for you but for your life and peace of mind, and those around you. Don't ever think that it want effect the ones around you because it does. Whatever is in your heart will spill out somewhere and you have to be willing to make a choice. Am I going to stay this way, and end up going to hell ?  You can't go on living in unforgivingness and expect to be successful in life. It's too consuming and it want profit you anything.

Choose to forgive. Pray for your enemies and those who spread horrible rumors and lies about you. Pray for those who despitefully use you and those who are abusive towards you. Learn to forgive and walk in the way of love. For those of you who are in abusive situations, you must forgive, but you don't have to stay in that situation. It's best to get out before it's too late.

I can not express enough the importance of forgiving someone who does you wrong and tells lies on you and abuses you and whatever else they have done. You have to forgive everyone. You can not hold anything against anyone, and expect to go to heaven it is impossible. You have to forgive, no matter what. It's your choice. You have to be willing to make a choice. Now are you willing to forgive? It's up to you. You choose heaven or hell, It's that simple. Forgive or not forgive it's up to you. It doesn't matter how many times they lied and took advantage of you and told whatever lies about you that was told. You still have to forgive. No matter how many times they abused you in whatever way or used and mistreated you. You still have to forgive.

By:
Bernice Bowling

The Beginning Of Sins......A short story you don't want to know!

Darkened strays stalked the night air as she walked in the woods past the moonlight creatures. She kissed the night in her heart as if it had been a lover. Oh, how she loved it. The electricity of night is what she called it. No one knew the blood lust that existed in her. The blood craving that emerged so strongly at the least bit of anger. Anger so strong that she could murder almost anyone, almost.

The thoughts of her first kill would sing out in her ears forever as she reminisced about how it felt to rip his skin off his clean, freshly shaven head while he was tied up, and screaming those beautiful, unearthly screams of his, ha, ha. What a sound she thought. She smiled; it was such a good smile, filled with such amusement that it was touching to the heart if you didn't know what she was really smiling about.

A soft bunny rabbit was what they thought of her. A soft furry bunny rabbit for them to pet, she thought as she laughed. She wasn't a bunny rabbit. She was more like a vicious demon from the darkest inner parts of hell that you could ever imagine. Fresh blood streaming down her blade as she slid the knife upward through his stomach, only after scalping him alive, then feeding the scalp to her wolf she kept as a pet nearby for such things. Chuckling to herself, remembering each detail. Oh, no one knew what fun really was, no one, but her and maybe a friend or two.  The pain that man must have felt as she ripped him apart. Splitting his man parts in half and dividing them between him and the wolf. Oh, how she loved the feed; too bad he took all the fun out of it when he died too fast. What a wimp! Oh, but she would learn how to keep them alive longer over time. She would learn; these things take time. Trial and error, don't you know,  trial and error.

By: Bernice Bowling

This short story is a good example of what a person could become if they don't learn to forgive and they let anger come in and take too great a foothold. You become a demon just like the ones who hurt you.  Learn to forgive and don't become like the horrible woman in this story. Invite Christ into your life. :)

Temperatures of Unrest

Temperatures of Unrest

Sweat and tears pour down like rain

I watch in vain

While the years pour out

Upon this window pane

I watch this traffic flow by each day

Wondering where and why life has taken me this way

And then I realize time stands still

During grey skies and clouds so full. 

Will it ever stop raining?

The sun needs to come out and shine

Give it to God, let him see it through

As the clouds begin to fade

The sunlight now shines through

Where people aren't so cruel

And Kindness rules

By Bernice Bowling

Two Advils In One Hand And A Chocolate Chicken In Another

Two Advils In One Hand And  A Chocolate Chicken In Another

Steely knives stabbing away at my insides

Hateful as a bear skinned alive

Trying to hide what I am feeling

Oh my goodness, how painful this existence

Pain making my hands shake

As I try not to bite the heads off these chocolate chickens

I bite the chickens' heads off anyway and spit them out

Where's me another?

Pain, gloves and Advil

Maybe a little love and sympathy...... NOT

At least not from this bunch

Hell hath no fury like a woman in pain 

Where did my love go?

It will come back with more Advil, lol.

Hand me my Pepsi

Anybody got anymore, chickens?

A dog or two maybe a cat or a bird?

What? Where did everybody go?

Don't run and hide?

Anybody got a Billy goat?

When will it end?

I hate this pure pain

 nobody understands

My time is worse than everyone else's.

How could it not be?

Everyone else can function.

Not me.

I need a heating pad, medication, and chocolate chickens

To get me through once a month

When it all returns

Who to strangle?

Adam?

The snake?

Or Eve?

By Bernice Bowling

Tid Bits and after thoughts of me rambling from subject to subject of the Bible

 We have forgiveness because Jesus died for our sins when he died on the cross and rose again the third day. Our belief in that is all we need to be saved from a devils hell.
 You must believe that Jesus is the son of God and that He died on the cross and rose again the third day. Confess your sins and ask God to forgive you and then forgive others as you have been forgiven. Trust God for the rest. If your having trouble forgiving ask God to help you and He will.  :)

How often have I felt like Daniel in that Lions den. you know the way you feel when you walk into a room filled with animosity, but nobody will say a word. You know they want to tear you a part, but their all playing lock jaw, at least in your presence. I'd say that's a lot like how Daniel felt as he was standing in this lions den. I don't think I would have slept there, but I imagine Daniel just may have cause he trusted in the Lord. He knew when you trust in the Lord no weapon formed against you shall prosper.

 I imagine what hell would be like when the angels are tossing you in there. The fires to me would look like molten lava. I don't imagine you would be able to see much cause the fires would be way to high . The air would be unbreathable taking your breath away where you can't even breath. I imagine the screams of all the lost souls and hellish angels to be so unnerving that it would spooke even the hardest of hearts. The very screams themselves would be like the liquid fires they were being burned in. swimming in the seas of hell. Somehow I don't think there will be any real swimming, but the presence of evil will be felt so strong that it would over take you if it weren't for the pain of the fires you were being burned in. Over and over never to feel anything ever again other then the presence of evil and those flames. It will be a place without God. That's some place I never want to be. By the way, I saw the outskirts of hell once in a dream it was much like I just described.  That was just the out skirts. It wasn't actually inside. So imagine that !

I love angels their so beautiful. The Bible does mention both male and female angels. I recently discovered a verse in the bible that tells about female angels. It is in Zechariah 5:9. We know there are male angels because of Michael the Ark angel That defends Israel, and Gabriel The messenger angel that was sent to Mary to tell her about Jesus, and now we have this scripture showing us that there are angels who are women. 

The Bible speaks of unicorns. So I know they exsisted. I am just not sure if they were like the unicorns in all the movies. I Imagine them to be among some of the most beautiful creatures to be seen. I can't wait to find out from God if that one horn has any sort of special meaning to it. I Imagine that it does, but I don't know that's just me and my thoughts on the matter. 


Virgins in the bible were a sign of purity, and to be kept that way until marriage. That goes for both men and women in case your wondering.  This double standard thing always ticked me off. What goes for one goes for the other and there's no changing it. If you don't believe me then try it and see if you go to Heaven Mr. male chauvinist ! Don't get me up on my soap box or I will never get off off that subject. 

My Heart's Song

My Heart's Song

Pain exists in worlds of 

what could have been

And the chains of internal prisons 

I cry forever not to exist

Everything to go black

Nothing to be missed

Lord, I am tired

Don't you see

I feel the pain and misery

I want to be free

I lift up my eyes to thee

From only you comes my help

My heart is drowning

In sorrow

No one to save me,

Help lift me up

Everyone has closed their eyes

No one to help me cry

They don't understand

I don't know how to explain

I need someone to listen

To help ease the pain

Sometimes, too weak to fight

Tired of fighting

I am not giving up,

Just trying to rest

Needing shelter from it all

Please be my shelter

Right now, I don't even know how to stand up.

Instead I can only kneel

Feeling lost

Helpless, and alone

Please help me to feel alive again

With joy, and a reason to live

Making my smile  like sunshine

Warm and friendly

Take away the dark side

Leave nothing bad behind

Give me peace.

Let depression leave

Where is this nothingness?

Where did it come from?

Take it away

Give purpose

Allow me to stay,

To pray

My son needs me

Fulfilling my purpose for whatever you sent

Even though I can't see it now

I know that it's real

You are real

You give me hope

My God alone can save me

By: Bernice Bowling

Jesus

Mark 14 :62 And Jesus said, I am: and ye shall see the Son of man sitting on the right hand of power, and coming in the clouds of heaven.

Matthew 24: 44 Therefore be ye also ready: for in such an hour as ye think not the son of man cometh

John 3 :16 For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in Him

should not perish but have everlasting life.

Matthew 24 : 43 But know this, that if the goodman of the house had known in what watch the thief would come, he would have watched, and would not have suffered his house to be broken up.

Matthew 25: 13 Watch therefore, for ye know neither day nor the hour wherein the son of man cometh.

Matthew ch 24: 30  And then shall appear the sign of the Son of man in heaven: and then shall all the tribes of the earth mourn, and they shall see the Son of man coming in the clouds of heaven with power and great glory.

Just Focus

Just Focus

She walks in the light of day,

Eyes closed, listening for a voice:

"My child, comfort be with thee,

 I have wiped the tears from your eyes-

Cry no more.

Let your joy be full.

Walk away from this mourning."

Close your eyes.

Rest for a little while.

I'll give you dreams

To help you make it through the night.

They will come true.

Trust in Me.

I will see you through.

She picks up a Bible.

And as she reads,

She sees the letters in red.

Where Jesus wept,

She wept too,

And He heard her.

He dried her tears,

And chased away her fears,

He told her all she needed to hear.

She listened for more.

As her tears softly dried

With the touch of His hand,

He comforted her.

"When do I get to go see the promised land?"

She asked. 

He said:

" Be patient, my child.

Focus on Me.

Forget about these other things,

And you will see-

Everything I promised you.

Just focus on Me.....

And you will see."

BY: Bernice Bowling