My Story Of Imperfection
Let me start out by saying my mom always tried to tell me I was just as good as anyone, and that no one was better than anyone else, but despite all this I still had self esteem issues.
In the begging I was a happy child full of confidence and joy. That is until I learned that I was pudgy or fat. That's when everything started to change. My confidence got less and less as I got older with being picked on and ridiculed because of my weight. Anyway, time marched on, an I found myself in high school battling even more self esteem issues. I didn't like my hair or my glasses or my weight. and Worst of all I got separated from most of my childhood friends.
Let me start out by saying my mom always tried to tell me I was just as good as anyone, and that no one was better than anyone else, but despite all this I still had self esteem issues.
In the begging I was a happy child full of confidence and joy. That is until I learned that I was pudgy or fat. That's when everything started to change. My confidence got less and less as I got older with being picked on and ridiculed because of my weight. Anyway, time marched on, an I found myself in high school battling even more self esteem issues. I didn't like my hair or my glasses or my weight. and Worst of all I got separated from most of my childhood friends.
Despite the fact that I got asked out quite a few times by different guys, I always said no for TWO reasons :
#1. I was afraid of mommy. She didn't allow me to date anyone. She was afraid I would end up on drugs.
#2. I always thought they were just making fun of me because I was so ugly.
A very close friend of mine that I met in my freshman year and remain best friends with right to this day told me something one day. She said Berny, You need to start telling yourself out loud that you are beautiful, because you are not ugly. I see guys checking you out all the time. You need to start speaking positive things to yourself. So I did . This was during my senior year that I began to do this.
Well my self esteem did start to improve after this, and It wasn't until my college years that I started to discover that I wasn't ugly like I had thought. I started to date a little, not much, but a little.
As I got older I still struggled with those childhood ghost and I have had a string of bad relationships and poor treatment from almost every relationship I have ever been in, but one. I am still trying to discover my self worth.
A very close friend of mine that I met in my freshman year and remain best friends with right to this day told me something one day. She said Berny, You need to start telling yourself out loud that you are beautiful, because you are not ugly. I see guys checking you out all the time. You need to start speaking positive things to yourself. So I did . This was during my senior year that I began to do this.
Well my self esteem did start to improve after this, and It wasn't until my college years that I started to discover that I wasn't ugly like I had thought. I started to date a little, not much, but a little.
As I got older I still struggled with those childhood ghost and I have had a string of bad relationships and poor treatment from almost every relationship I have ever been in, but one. I am still trying to discover my self worth.
By now you're probably asking yourself why are you sharing all this now?
I said all this to say that because of all the pain that I have went through over the years I am a strong advocate for trying to make other people feel good about themselves by offering up encouragement and inspiration when, and wherever I go. I don't ever want to see anyone go through what I went through, and what I still sometimes struggle with right today.
I want people to know they are beautiful just the way they are, and that they can do anything they set their mind to, and to never let anyone put them down or make them feel any less then a person. You are just as good as anyone, no matter who you are, what color your skin is, or what size jeans you wear. You are beautiful and you are loved by God! Have confidence in your self. Never let anyone put you down or make you feel less then a person. Those who do this are full of insecurities themselves, and that's how they make themselves feel better, by making others feel like their small or beneath them, but when people do this it is they themselves who are small!
Don't listen to the lies of the Devil. Listen to God. He made you in His image, and you are special to him each and everyone. Everyone was put on this earth for a reason. We each have our own unique gifts and talents to bring to the table. We just have to make the right choice to embrace it.
BY: Bernice Bowling
I hope this helps someone who may be going through a ruff time. :)
I want people to know they are beautiful just the way they are, and that they can do anything they set their mind to, and to never let anyone put them down or make them feel any less then a person. You are just as good as anyone, no matter who you are, what color your skin is, or what size jeans you wear. You are beautiful and you are loved by God! Have confidence in your self. Never let anyone put you down or make you feel less then a person. Those who do this are full of insecurities themselves, and that's how they make themselves feel better, by making others feel like their small or beneath them, but when people do this it is they themselves who are small!
Don't listen to the lies of the Devil. Listen to God. He made you in His image, and you are special to him each and everyone. Everyone was put on this earth for a reason. We each have our own unique gifts and talents to bring to the table. We just have to make the right choice to embrace it.
BY: Bernice Bowling
I hope this helps someone who may be going through a ruff time. :)