Black Death

Black Screams dry out
Scratching bloody places down my arms
blood drips in streams of unforgiveness
I see the bloody tips of my teeth
stained with the pain of yesteryear

Agony encloses in the darkness around me
drowning in a sea of unforgetfulness
I lay limp on the ground
wet from storms of pain

Help me I am dying
Help me escape
Leave me alone
Let me be
Go away

No one wants you here.
 Wanting to disappear
Void of consciousness
screaming tears running down my face
I cry alone

My mother awakens me
She holds out her hand
I take it
She leads me away.

By: Bernice Bowling

I dreamed I got turned into a vampire

Malcolm always had me sit beside him in the truck and then Marcus on the other side of Malcolm with the red-headed, freckled face guy named Redgie for the driver. Malcolm, with his raven, black hair that was kind of long, but not long enough to go down past his neck, had a fierce Jealousy of Marcum. Despite his model-like good looks.  I think he always knew I kind of liked him. So he was going to make sure I stayed away without being too obvious. We had made a stop to get some supplies we were going to need like gas, etc for the vampire revolution. When somehow because of Redgie  I was now sitting beside Marcus.  Both Marcus and I both were overjoyed. We were like two teenagers. We had sent secret smiles across the room back and forth for a while now. Malcolm was always so jealous and always smothering me with the attention that I could never get near Marcus. I was always torn between my affection for the two. I knew then in my heart who I had finally chosen. Malcolm was furious but never said a word. He knew he would take his chance when Marcus was unaware, dropping off and being Lazy. Marcus then put his arm around me and we both smiled like we were long-lost lovers who had finally found each other. I know it sounds silly, but it was like we really connected then.

After we finished gathering supplies Marcus and Malcolm went home. Malcolm lived in a high-class neighborhood. You might say he lived with the Rich and the spoiled. On the other hand, Marcus lived in a kind of dusty old Apartment on the south side of town where all the vampire activity was more rampant.

The next day Malcolm had shown up. He had changed. His aura was slightly darker, and his skin was paler. I then noticed the two bite marks on his neck.  Jana had turned Malcolm into a  vampire.  Jana I feared had always wanted Malcolm, but Malcolm never could stand her, even before she became a vampire. 
She had never been a match for me with With my voluptuous breast, long black hair that reached my waist, and my curvy good looks that had been known to stop traffic, but she had turned Malcolm, and Malcolm didn't seem to care.  We didn't speak for a while. We never did have to. We could always read each other's thoughts. It was the same with me and Marcus as well, and this time was no different. I thought being a vampire would change everything about you, but it didn't or it didn't seem to. 
Just as I was about to ask Malcolm what happened, Marcus came in and looked very distraught. He looked like he had been in some kind of wreck. His clothes were in an array and well,  his hair was always messy, but his face looked, I don't know paler kind of like Malcolm's.
 I asked him what happened. He said " I got in a fight last night with this group of vampires. I was able to escape most of them, but Jana caught me by surprise and bit me." 
I said: Oh my gosh! Marcum got a bit too."
Marcum then showed him the marks on his neck. They caught me as I was on my way home. I had stopped in with a friend in the lower part of town to pick up something he had for me.

"I feel like I am changing," Marcus said. How long does it take you to change?"
Malcolm said," It took me just a couple of hours" How long have you been bit?" 
"
I don't know. I just know it was last night at about 3:00 am. Somewhere around there." Said Marcus. I was in my apartment when a bunch of them came busting in. Apparently, you don't have to be invited.
"It wants to belong then", Malcolm said.

Now Marcus had sort of dusty black hair that always seemed disheveled. He was very handsome and was somewhat kinder than Malcolm, who always seemed removed.  Anyway, I was not a vampire yet and I didn't want to be. By Marcus living in an area where Vampires activity was more frequent is probably why he got bit so quick, but vampires were everywhere. Malcolm could have saved himself if he had not been in that part of town. It was a dangerous time out and I let both Marcus and Malcolm stay at my house for some stupid reason with the promise they would not harm them. But I could tell they wanted to.

The next day, We all decided to go to this bar and grill just outside of town. When Jane called to ask to come over. Now, Malcolm still hated Jana with a passion, but Marcus didn't hate her as much and wanted her to keep company with us. But I would not agree to let her go anywhere with us especially now after what she did. Malcolm tried to argue that since they were now vampires that it would be the smart thing to do in vampire society. I still said no, and he didn't protest. I didn't trust Jana. I knew she would try to turn me as well. If she got half the chance.

By: Bernice Bowling

Daddy's Legacy He Left Behind

There was love in daddy's heart when he drove me back and forth to school all those years. There was love in daddy's heart when he would sit on the floor, and play dolls with me as a child. There was love in daddy's heart when he would drive all over to get me that special toy or gift I wanted for Christmas or that certain brand of soup or kind of cookie. There was love in daddy's heart when he would worry about me being out late at night. There was love in daddy's heart each time he prayed for me even though he wasn't saved. There was love in daddy's heart when he quit driving that cold truck after he wrecked when I was around five years old. There was love in daddy's heart with each painful step he took. There was love in daddy's heart from the time I was born. There was love!


By: Bernice Bowling

My daddy was able to pray before he died. Praise the Lord! He prayed!

Which Way

Back away from the world, back away,
hide thyself from prying eyes and human cries,
Run my child, run to the wilderness where the trees have no end.
Lean on the branches on a hill
Be careful, some might break off

Run my child run to me I say
For this dark course
is only going to decay
Run for your life my child
run to the light
turn away from darkness delight


for you are not turned to darkness
you are the light
the light of the world can not be hid
don't listen to the voice inside your head
turn to me I say
For I am the Father, and I change NOT!

By: Bernice Bowling

When You Feel Like You Are Being Spit On

I know what it is like to cry tears like rain.
I know what it is like to be spit on
I know what it is like for people to not have faith in you,
even though you have given them no reason NOT to.

I know what it is like to struggle in trials
I know what it is like to want to hide inside
I know the pain and the tears you have cried.
I know.

When the winds and the rains come,
The boat is rocked.
Call unto me, have faith and believe
I can calm the storms of life
Trust in me

Send me your tears
Send me your prayers
Let me have your burdens to bear.
Cry unto me all ye heavy laden
and I will give you the rest

I alone am God and I will give you rest.
I will give you comfort
Have faith in me
I will make your enemies at peace with you
I will make them your footstool.

Why do you fear what man can do unto you?
Did I not say I if God is for you then who can be against you?
Did I not say I would make you the head and not the tail.
You are above and not beneath
You are more than a conqueror

Have faith, my child. Have faith in me.
After all, I have faith in you
These are things we must go through
Stay strong, and stay focused
In these things, you learn who you can trust.

My peace I leave with you
Let your joy be made full
For the joy of the Lord is your strength
Remember, No weapon that is formed against you shall prosper
The gates of Hell shall not prevail

They don't know you, Not like I do
They know not what they do.
For they did these things to me too.
Love, Jesus.

By: Bernice Bowling

I am Not Perfect

I am not perfect. I mess up. I make mistakes.  What do you do when you mess up and you make mistakes ?

1. Ask God to forgive you
"If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." (1 John 1:9). 

You keep on going. You don't give up. You don't give in. You dig in harder. You read the word of God that much more. You praise and worship that much more. You give God glory that much more. You study that much more. You PRAY that much more,  and you do whatever you need to do to get that much closer to God.

If you draw nigh to him then he will draw nigh to you.

James 4:8 Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you. Cleanse your hands, ye sinners; and purify your hearts, ye double minded.

The slushy Icy Road Dream

I dreamed I was going to Hazard and I was supposed to take the car. I was going to buy gifts for some holiday, I think it was mothers day, and I wanted to go the old way, towards Browns Fork, and it was looking like it might get bad out. So I took the car and parked it and I got the 4 wheeler out. I never ever ride a 4 wheeler. Anyway, Jessie and Norman DID NOT KNOW I had taken the 4 wheeler. It was almost as if I had stolen it. Anyway, I was having trouble getting up the hill cause there was slushy ice everywhere and  I finally made it to the top by the skin of my teeth, and If I had not taken the 4 wheeler, I would not have made it. When I got there mommy said Hi Berny I spent some of your money on mothers day gifts, and I said that is ok  I bought you some stuff already anyway.  What did you buy, and she said I bought myself a cape, and Tyna and Dean were there and they had been with mommy, and I had decided not to go to Hazard after all cause it was too bad out. I still needed to call Jessie, and Norman and let them know where I was and that I had taken the 4 wheeler but I had made it alright.

It was very slippery and dangerous out. If I had not had that 4 wheeler I would not have made it. That 4 wheeler was a 4 wheel drive.


What this dream means is, that it might get bad out and it may seem like you are not going to make it to the top, but don't give up and in the end, you will make it home.

The 4 wheeler I believe is some sort of anointing or ministry that will take me to the top.


The devil may lie to me and try to make me believe I don't have the right to use the anointing, but the devil is a liar!